feelings

I can relate to a lot of that what should have been a happy time right after we got married turned into him sleeping with a coworker and me begging him not to go out the door holding our 4 month old son....I have a lot of anger he claims to have only been physically unfaithful that one night but i don't buy that, I can't explain why i don't other than woman's intuition, but i will never get that "honeymoon" phase of being newly married back it's soiled and the joy of finally giving him his son after we already had 3 girls........gone are those feelings and that time, the only positive coming to mind right now is that we are young he just turned 30 i just turned 29 and if we stay together there is more time to make new memories, but i will never have my time back there is no way around that